Critique 2:

After researching the idea of Everything Being Connected , there are multiple agreements and disagreements as to whether this is a solid fact. Although there are many non scientific and scientific views on this idea, in relation to the brief I feel it is a difficult subject to create a narrative around, to engage the audience successfully as it is a completely subjective idea and that is the reason I have decided to change my idea in which to create a narrative more successfully.

In relation to the idea of everything being connected and creating a story around this, I attempted to create a time lapse of a Lily flower opening. By researching how to create a home studio by blacking out a confined space to create contrast between the subject and the background, using two red lamps and lukewarm water to increase the time of the flower blooming and filming for a number of days to then be able to edit and create the timelapse of the flower. I invested in two lamps, two red fireglow lightbulbs, a bunch of Lilys and borrowed equipment from the University such as a sturdy filming tripod, canon 5dsr, 50mm 1.8 lens, charger for the batterys, however I didn’t take in to consideration the length of time the camera would need to be running for (approx 2/3 days whilst the flowers bloomed) which would mean I would need to use a battery pack extended on to the camera. If I didn’t use a specialised battery pack to keep the camera on, when changing the battery I would need to take in to consideration the continuancy of each shot to ensure the effect was realistic and ran smoothly throughout. Although this idea was not successful at this time, it is an idea I would like to practice with to get right and create in time outside university projects, as personal work.

Critique 2 reflection:

After changing my idea I began to shoot around the subject of the emotions individuals may encounter when moving to a new city or place. I based my inspiration around the question of ‘Does city life make you more or less lonely?’ and an article by The Guardian: which is an interesting article about personal experiences of individuals highlighting how cities are full of people yet loneliness can still be apparent. The short video I put together was based on this experience however I felt it is vague and didn’t have any context in regards to creating a narrative. I showed it to others to get another opinion on it other than myself and asked what feelings and ideas do they get from watching it, replies included:

  • “I felt motivated after watching it due to the hustle and bustle of the city”
  • “You have some nice filming included to show life moving by”
  • “On the whole it needs more context to create the narrative and to tie it all together”

(I apologize for the quality of the film on vimeo.)
I took into consideration this useful feedback around how my video impacts the audience and the message they take from watching it. It was then decided much more context needs to be included as it would be much more effective in a cohesive sequence. The scene opens from a first person point of view on a train journey, to show arriving or departing from a place (symbolize moving cities), it then cuts to a scene of an individual on the train with her back towards the camera, sitting along and thoughtfully looking out towards the city from the train. I then used a linear wipe transition to cut from the girl sitting on the train (second person perspective) and back to first person perspective to give an impression of being in the eyes of the girl making the journey which I edited to appear faster to exaggerate the business of the city. I understand how switching from first to second person point of view could become confusing and disorientating for the viewer after considering how the different scenes are put together to create a narrative. Towards the end of the film we see the girl looking out over the city at night time to signify loneliness and isolation. The film was then converted to black and white to signify the sadness and depression that could be paired with being alone. Personally after receiving the feedback from showing friends and family I realize the narrative is not clear and the film comes across as quite random as the film has been edited to look quite contrasting and dark but the message is positive, mainly due to the choice of music which makes a high contrast. In order to improve this I should pair it with more ambient music and reassess the message I want to portray which involves researching Denotations and Connotations in the book ‘Photography By David Bate published by Bloomsbury’ which will help me to transfer the message in a correct way.

From this critique I have decided I need to add more of a specific context. Below is my rewritten project proposal.

Project Proposal

I am choosing to focus my Areas of Photographic practice project on the personal experience of moving to a new way of life as I believe this is a much more open topic to discuss through means of creating a narrative rather than Everything Is Connected. I want to create this by showing the topic through a narrative structure of film and still images. I aim to create a personal documentary approach to this and investigate the experience on the individual such as the challenges faced, feelings, familiarization, cultural differences and memories of home.

I wish to produce this body of work to create a personal perspective on moving to a new place, to give the audience an insight on what it is like to experience uprooting your life, starting completely fresh and choosing whether to take on the new culture and lifestyle.

Aims & Objectives
My intended approach is to conduct interviews and personal experience of another through an interview as it gives a personal account of the experience with no bias. I feel as though an interview persuades an audience as it is real life and this adds credibility. I aim to show this in a Documentary format to give my audience an approach of realness through a narrative of an individual’s experience. I aim to inform my intended audience of the individual’s story to bring awareness of cultural differences and similarities faced when moving somewhere new. I intend to piece the film together by raw footage and stills to document one persons journey of migration to one country to another and their own personal experience of that. I intend to use no narration but I do intend to use a personal point of view by letting the interviewee tell the story. This means I will take into consideration what questions to ask and how in regards to attaining an interesting result which doesn’t influence the answer. There are many reasons why people decide to move to a new country or place either for work or educational reasons. Statistics show that more than three percent of the world has migrated (232 Million people) therefore my intended audience could be very broad however I want to focus on the younger generation as this is a fast growing trend. From statistics the age of young people both male and female leaving home to move country is between 19 – 27.

The support I require will be to borrow equipment such as camera, lens’, tripod, lighting from the University. Travel considerations will involve getting to and from locations I choose to film at. In regards to the individual involved in the Documentary I will take this into account to give something back to them to say Thank you for taking part and giving their time.



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